What do I want to make documentaries for? What do I want to make films for? Do I really want to make films? Which one would I want more? I just want to be able to see my thoughts in something tangible. That's why I wanted sewing, that's why I wanted filming. But why? Is it to confirm that I have thoughts? That I have a brain? That I can think?
What do I want to do in life? Something meaningful that would improve people's lives for the better in the long run.
What do I want to achieve in this world?
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And, I do not know the answers. And therefore I do not want to specialize. You know what the opportunity cost of this is? $24,000. And maybe more. Also, a shorter distance. Also, the ability to see my baby brother grow up. That, money cannot buy. I don't care how many people wanted this opportunity and didn't get it. This opportunity, dangling on a golden thread even, but somehow it doesn't feel like me to grab it, it just does not feel like myself. I don't want this. I want a pulsating thriving learning environment that so far in the history of my life, only FOUR people gave to me- Mr Yeo, Ms Rehana, Ms Lim and Sean. This is the environment that I love. This is it. And later, I'll make something out of this. I want discussion of the theories of the world. Not really just communications or media. Something deeper. Do I sound like a philo student? Hah. What to do? I just love knowledge. I love knowledge but was too scared to take KI. And now I'm too scared to take Comms Studies. Not just cos after reading the course structure, I feel that it does not really provide me with much, but my expiry date of staying in hall (with my inertia to take part in hall activities ) will probably last one year. I know that your future is what you make of yourself, I'd probably last more than that if I wanted to but I am really reluctant to travel from one end of Singapore, to the other.
And, I do not know the answers. And therefore I do not want to specialize. You know what the opportunity cost of this is? $24,000. And maybe more. Also, a shorter distance. Also, the ability to see my baby brother grow up. That, money cannot buy. I don't care how many people wanted this opportunity and didn't get it. This opportunity, dangling on a golden thread even, but somehow it doesn't feel like me to grab it, it just does not feel like myself. I don't want this. I want a pulsating thriving learning environment that so far in the history of my life, only FOUR people gave to me- Mr Yeo, Ms Rehana, Ms Lim and Sean. This is the environment that I love. This is it. And later, I'll make something out of this. I want discussion of the theories of the world. Not really just communications or media. Something deeper. Do I sound like a philo student? Hah. What to do? I just love knowledge. I love knowledge but was too scared to take KI. And now I'm too scared to take Comms Studies. Not just cos after reading the course structure, I feel that it does not really provide me with much, but my expiry date of staying in hall (with my inertia to take part in hall activities ) will probably last one year. I know that your future is what you make of yourself, I'd probably last more than that if I wanted to but I am really reluctant to travel from one end of Singapore, to the other.
And since I have always been getting what I get due to my hard work. I am sure I will get this too. I will position myself to amongst those who will get the opportunity to stay in Unitown.
